Burned out, drink too much, overweight, slightly depressed, and probably suffering from PTSD

[Asysin2leads]

I feel for you, portland. A lot of providers are in the same boat you are. You do seem to be suffering from the effects of PTSD, but I also think there is a psychological phenomenon that is more insidious than just a single event PTSD. I'm not sure if there is a proper term for it, other than burnout, but for me it is the cumulative effect of minor stresses in EMS that really does in a provider's spirit. Any one thing, a broken down truck, an obnoxious or incompetent partner, a harassing supervisor or belligerent patient, none of these thing in of themselves are a major stress, but put them all together, day in and day out, for years, and it will destroy you mentally, physically, and spiritually. Its like a grain of sand that has been rubbing for so long its started to cut down to the bone.

My suggestion is get counselling for your PTSD. You may need to several before you find the one that is right for you. Be wary of any that only pays lip service to your complaints before suggesting medication. Medication can be used to augment PTSD counselling but really only one on one talk therapy helps. In addition, you need to sit down and add up the day to day stresses and what you can do to mitigate them. List everything, right down to the burnt coffee smelling up the station. Think long and hard about what its going to take to get those things to stop effecting you. Is it time off work? Is it taking more control of your workplace? Is cutting down on the hours?

People turn to drugs and alcohol because, to be blunt, they work. People wouldn't use them if they didn't. But in the long run they only make things worse, and not in a "Just say no, find Jesus" kind of way, but in that they compound the problems you already have and make coping with them harder.

I would say PM me or chat me up on here sometime, but I am not a mental health professional, and that is what you really need. Find someone good.

[portland medic]

Wow. Let me start off by thanking everyone who posted. It's nice to get some support, and this place seems like a great forum. People who don't work in EMS just don't understand what we go through, so I really appreciate all the responses in such a short time. Just to clear something up I don't have a coke problem, and haven't done it in almost a year. Probably shouldn't have even written that. Don't really like it, and don't plan on doing it anymore. It's not really the coke I was doing, it was a general lifestyle of binging with hard partying. The coke just happened to be there. It's just kind of a general binging on whatever is in front of me, TV, movies, food, beer, hell even nicotine gum! Haha!

Lately it's been the bottle I turn to to calm me down after long days. That, and doing nothing. Last night when I posted this I was in a pretty dark place, and felt a little hopeless. I feel much better after a good nights sleep and reading all of your supporting comments. I do have a good support system around with a great girlfriend (soon to be fiance) and a great family. I'm gonna turn to them for support and a rigorous exercise regimen to start with. I think I may also seek some professional help with my stress ( and maybe mild PTSD ). Thanks again for all your kind and supportive words. You make me feel less alone.

[BlueSkies]

I feel much better after a good nights sleep and reading all of your supporting comments. I do have a good support system around with a great girlfriend (soon to be fiance) and a great family. I'm gonna turn to them for support and a rigorous exercise regimen to start with. I think I may also seek some professional help with my stress ( and maybe mild PTSD ). Thanks again for all your kind and supportive words. You make me feel less alone.

Brother, believe it or not a lot of us have Dx and UnDx PTSD. You are talking to one right now. The support system you have along with the new exercise program will help but you know as well as I do that stress IS A KILLER!

Don't use the statement, "I think I may also seek professional help." Just go...bite the bullet like I did a few years ago and go...SOON! You will feel better and please don't ever hesitate to come post here again with anything else. This took massive courage to admit and we are probably all reading this saying to ourselves, "I have been there or I am there now."

Stay safe my brother.

Edited October 28, 2011 by Gulfmedic9538