Watch Your Mouth

[firedoc5]

Everything was fine with the Johnson boys, Jimmy, 17, and Peter, 14, except their foul language. Mrs. Johnson didn't know what to do with her sons to stop them from cursing, often at most inappropriate times, so she finally asked her pediatrician if he had any advice.

"Mrs. Johnson," the doctor told her, "This is a very simple problem with a very simple and very direct solution. You have to make it so unpleasant for your boys to curse that they will stop doing it."

"How?" the mother asked. "I've already lectured them and begged them, I've told them how indecent it is, but nothing seems to help."

The doctor shook his head. "Direct action, Mrs. Johnson, is the only way that will work, and you must implement it instantly. The next time one of your boys uses unacceptable language, don't lecture, don't plead, just simply hit him -- hard -- so that he will immediately associate swearing with being hurt. I guarantee you that will solve the problem."

So the next morning, while the boys were in the kitchen, Mrs. Johnson asked her elder son, "What would you like for breakfast, this morning, Jimmy?"

"Gimme some of that f%$*'n oatmeal, Ma!" Jimmy snarled.

Carefully recalling the doctor's prescription, Mrs. Johnson quickly stepped to the table where Jimmy was sitting, and suddenly cold-cocked her son with a rabbit-punch to the jaw. Jimmy, taken completely by surprise, fell back with his chair, hit his head against the floor, and was out cold, bleeding from the space in this mouth where, a few seconds earlier, two of his teeth had been securely in place.

Mrs. Johnson then turned to her younger son, smiled sweetly, and said to him, "Now Peter, Dear, what would you like for breakfast this morning?"

Peter stared at his mother, and then at his older brother lying unconscious and bleeding on the floor, and then again at his mother. After a short pause, he answered, "I don't know, Ma, but you can bet your sweet @$# I don't want any of that f%$*'n oatmeal!"

Cold-cock him too. :blackeye: