REDNECK MEDICAL TERMS

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Redneck Medical Terms

Artery

The study of paintings.

Bacteria

Back door to cafeteria.

Barium

What doctors do when patients die.

Benign

What you be after you be eight.

Catscan

Searching for Kitty.

Cauterize

Made eye contact with her.

Cesarean Section

A neighborhood in Rome.

Colic

A sheep dog.

Coma

A punctuation mark.

D&C

Where Washington is.

Dilate

To live long.

Enema

Not a friend.

Fester

Quicker than someone else.

Fibula

A small lie.

Genital

Non-Jewish person.

G.I.Series

World Series of military baseball.

Hangnail

What you hang your coat on.

Impotent

Distinguished, well known.

Labor Pain

Getting hurt at work.

Medical Staff

A Doctor's cane.

Morbid

A higher offer than I bid.

Nitrates

Cheaper than day rates.

Node

I knew it.

Outpatient

A person who has fainted.

Ovaries

You get to try again.

Pap Smear

A fatherhood test.

Pelvis

Second cousin to Elvis.

Post Operative

A letter carrier.

Recovery Room

Place to do upholstery.

Rectum

Pretty near killed him.

Secretion

Hiding something.

Seizure

Roman emperor.

Tablet

A small table.

Terminal Illness

Getting sick at the airport.

Tumor

More than one.

Urine

Opposite of you're out.