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Feeling Trapped...


samson722

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no, I'm still here. sorry I didn't have the chance to respond. things have changed a lot since i was here last. i've got a year left at berklee and then i'm off to LA. i might try and work out there for a private on the weekends. EMS is something I feel very strongly about, and it's something that I want to do no matter what the cost. things have gotten better between the management and myself, it was mostly an issue of communication between myself and my supervisors about what's going on and how i'm feeling. they explained to me that they weren't there to hang anyone out to dry, and that they'd be willing to work with me to resolve the situation. now that that is place, i do feel more confident working on the truck. it's honestly less often that i'm having a problem with the patients, in that my biggest asset has always been my communication skills, and i work very well with people. the biggest part of the issue was that i was getting scared, not thinking about things one step at a time, and screwing up. it was a lot of little things happening that i would dwell on, which soon became a big confidence issue. it wasn't necessarily that i didn't feel i could do it, it more that i felt like i didn't have the support of my partner(s) or supervisors in my education while at this dept. i hate to be long-winded, but this has pretty much been resolved, aside from the fact that business is painfully slow right now, and we have no pagers, so even i wanted to work regularly, it wouldn't happen. i'm making time wherever i can to hang around the station and learn things from the more experienced, whether that means taking the truck for a drive, or talking about pt. assessment, or even drilling on CPR or whatever. they seem to be satisfied, and the important part is they're showing that now, which in turn has made me feel more confident in myself. ok...i'll stop there... i can't type anymore. thanks everyone for your kind words and helpful suggestions. who knows? i might take you up on them when i get myself out to LA. take care everyone, and stay safe.

Cheers!

Samson

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