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How did you handle your first lost?


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I remember my first code like it was yesterday. I was effected by that for a couple days, but by far the worst, was working a code on my grandmother. That was by far the toughest thing to do. That was just over a month ago. For my sake, I wont go into the details, but has anyone else had an experience with working on a family member?

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Luckily, my Grandmother died after I had been in EMS for way too many years, so I knew better than to put her through. I let her die with a little dignity.

I did CPR on one of my cats though. That bothers me more than any human patient I ever lost.

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I was wondering is it normal to be sad, when you lose a pte?

If by "normal" you mean usual, the answer is no. Most medics go on to the next run and never give it another thought. I've never been sad over a loss. Only a couple of times in thirty-five years have I seen a partner sad over a loss, and those were kids.

But if, by "normal" you mean within the expected and acceptable range of emotions for a human being, then yes, it is normal. But no, not for a perfect stranger that was dead before you even got there, with no particular outstanding features about the incident.

Regardless, there is one thing you need to understand clearly. You did not "lose" a "patient". He was never your patient, and he was dead before you ever saw him. If you are going to take a personal responsibility for that, get out of EMS now before it eats you up.

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Thank you for eney help or advice you can give me.

You can feel a bit sad, but my god (or deity of choice) man, get over it.

How long have you been in EMS, if you don't mind me asking??

FYI: spellcheck is in bottom right corner of reply box

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Don't stop writing! Keep in here. PM me if you want advice with dealing with emotionally difficult patients.

Wendy

CO EMT-B

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Well i have bin in this only 5 months, so i understand im not at your level of experience.

And im sorry if my writing is not the best, i personally just want to make friends and get help from plp that know what its like to be in a bad spot.

IM SORRY AND I PROMISE I WONT WRITE HERE ENEY MORE SORRY!

How about reading this instead.....

http://www.emtcity.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=11170

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when i had my first loss i was 18, a probe on a volley squad the only cert i had was cpr at the time, so i was with 2 emts, i was doing paper work and i hear staring cpr, i froze for a min. than snapped back in to things. did compressions all the way to the hospital transferred the patient. and thats when i lost it, i sat in the bay at the hospital crying my eyes out smoking about 1/2 a pack of smokes. one the way back to the station they pulled over to put me on O2. it is one call that i will never forget. but it all just makes you stronger

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I hadn't gone on a burn patient until last year. 60 some year old lady had leaned over a candle wearing a robe. I guess it must have been an old robe or something because it went up in a flash. We get there, 60% second and third degree. Pt is screaming about the pain, get the pt out to the rig. 02, IV, MS. Get to the hospital, they intubate her, then we take her to the burn center 2 hours away. What bothered me about this was that she had terminal cancer and was out touring the country with her husband before she died. Like she needed another problem on top of the cancer. I've had several burn patients since then and the only thing that really bothers me anymore is the smell. I just can't get it out of my nose.

The one call that really bothered me was a triple fatal accident. 26 y/o female, 17 y/o female, and an 8 y/o boy.(I found out the ages about a week later) The car had left the roadway and hit a tree on its top. The car horse-shoed around the tree, so the front and rear bumper were about 3 feet apart. The boys leg was hanging out and one of the females arms was hanging out. That was all you could see. My partner and I didn't even know there was a third person in the car. It took FD 4 hours to get the car cut apart enough to get the bodies out. For about a week that is all I could really think about.

Talking to others about something that bothers you is probably the best way I've found to deal with it. Sooner or later everybody will have a call that bothers them.

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