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Mobey: I am seeing all the classic hallmarks of PTSD here (from my knowledge base of the disorder as a CISD debriefing technician and a nearly-nurse). Good on you for recognizing something's wrong. Good calls, bad calls, anything that was a stressor is being worked back through in your brain.

I would advocate that instead of just looking at mental health care as PRN, that you make that one of your first priorities as you're working through this initial onslaught. You've got some pretty good ideas lined out, but I would advocate that you find that confidant in someone who can help you process with a professional angle. Just my two cents. It is also not shameful or harmful to consider that you may temporarily need some medication if things get too hairy. You'd take a Z-pack for pneumonia, right? ;-)

Also... my inbox is always open, and I am used to being a "vault"- once said to me, does not go further than me without permission. I am that confidant for my SAR team for the hairy, not so hairy, and just plain "I don't know where else to take this" kind of stuff.

Lots of love to you, Mobes... hang in there. This will get better!

Wendy

CO EMT-B

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