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Just a little respect?


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The guy I'm talking about isn't a boss to me or anything of that fact, the only.difference between me and him is hes been on for a long time. He is a lutentiant (spelled wrong Sorry!) In the fire service. Our EMS cheif has told him many times that his ranking in the fire service has nothing to do with ems and he has no right claiming hes better then others nor does he have right to clash fire with ems when it doesn't need to be. My EMS cheif has told the boss (fire cheif) who overlooks everything in the FD and I have also of problems I've been having with this guy and other problems also but he will refuse to do anything because "Superior" is one less person who will be on the department and he can't afford to loose "Superior". I'm pretty sure we could run just as good without him.

But I will take your advice and no longer make myself so vulnerable. I will do what I know is right and will no longer take the abuse. And I will start keeping records. My EMS cheif says it'll make our boss less easy to overlook it and not do anything about it.

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As a woman who has been in EMS for nearly 20 yrs....heres some advice. STOP apologizing. Period! There has been some excellent advice given already and some important points.

1. You cant run every call. Being tired, falling asleep at the wheel will lead to a disaster that will ruin you and your service.

2. Stand up for yourself. As soon as you let this guy know that you dont HAVE to be there and you arent going to put up with his BS anymore, the quicker it will stop.

3. Being professional, whether its a volly service or paid, is a MUST. The patient and thier family dont usually remember the good you do. But they ALWAYS remember any dissent in the ranks.

I started in a volly service in NC. Then came home to NY and joined the local volly service there. There will always be someone in the company that doesnt like new people and will make thier life miserable if you let them. And you are letting him. Stop it. Now. Give him a little resistance, show him that you arent a scared, tired, little girl that is looking for respect. Earn it by refusing to bow down to him...in other words "grow a set".

From someone who has been there to someone up and coming....I promise you, once you take the advice given in all the above posts...life will get much easier for you. Good luck!

Nothing to add excellent advice from a pro ..

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Does he have an EMS license?

If not then explain in a friendly manner that pt care is your responsibility.

His job on EMS calls is in a support function.

Just so you know: I am presently a two hatter, A Captain of the Fire Department and the rescue chief, so these are things that I've had to deal with.

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This will sound harsh, but that's what the professional world is about. This guy sounds like a grade A douche. The first thing you need to do when dealing with a person giving you grief is to evaluate yourself. You say you're a professional in the Fire/EMS field. Yet you can't spell "lieutenant" or "chief", words that I would say would be in common usage for a Fire/EMS professional. If I were introduced to a new person in the service, and I read their paperwork with gross spelling errors of common words, I would lose respect for them. Its sloppy.

Secondly, as a woman in the fire service, you are at a disadvantage. By that, I mean you are in a profession where basically upper and lower body strength and aerobic endurance are the key components you need for success, and genetically speaking, men are more gifted in that area, so it will be harder for you to achieve the same standards. I know many women in the fire service. Generally they are built like Angelina Jolie in Tomb Raider if she did all her own stunts, or are even bigger or bulkier. Male or female, if you cannot go up four flights of stairs, in full turnout gear, SCBA, knock down a door, and do a drag on a 200 lbs person, then you're not really cut out for the fire service.

Now that may not be a popular or a politically correct attitude, but from a physics standpoint, that's the truth. Now I've never met you and maybe indeed you're like the person I described above and if that's the case, good for you, congratulations, may you do well in years of fire service. If not, if you are more like the smaller, less physically advantaged women I have also met who insist that they do just as good as the guy who can bench 200 lbs, then try to understand why others might have a poor attitude when it comes to working with you.

Edited by Asysin2leads
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Your brain is supposed to be smarter than a smart phone. Besides, blaming technology for your shortcomings is a pretty lame cop out.

If you want to be respected stop making excuses. Do it right the first time. Take ownership of what you do. Those will be good first steps for you.

Good luck.

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Ask "superior", after the call, to assist you in correcting your alleged errors, as to specifics of "what was done 'incorrectly'" and "what to do instead next time", especially if the person also rides the ambulance or rescue with you.

Oh, keep a record of where and when that person disrespects you as a woman, especially if it's done in front of others (witnesses), so if you want to take it to the Equal Economic Opportunities Commission (on presumption you're working within the United States) as him making for a hostile work environment, it would help your case against him. Sometimes the threat of the EEOC, and monitary fines, could be enough.

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Here is what I told my son when he was faced with bullies in his school

I first told him to tell the bully this "Shut up, your opinion means nothing to me" and then walk away

Second, if the bullying continues look the bully in the eye and say "I'm done with you and the next time you act this way I'm going to the prinicipal"

Third, if he feels he's in danger "kick some ass"

Well that's what youh ave to do. Just ignore the troll and he will find someone else to abuse. Document each time he's been an asshole and threatening or abusive to you. Note any witnesses.

Once you have your ducks in a row, go to the chief. Tell him he has to do something with this guy, tell him you have multiple incidents documented on the agressive and abusive behaviour and if it doesn't stop immediately, you will file a hostile work environment complaint and refer it to your attorney.

once you take that step be prepared for a fight. The old knuckle draggers who are his friends are going to try to eat you up and spit you out and try to make you the bad guy/gal here, which of course dirtbags stick together. Stand your ground and don't back down. It's gonna get rough if you take it this far but sometimes you have to be the bigger person and get rid of the dinosaurs, I mean global warming got rid of the dino's, you can too.

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I still humbly suggest trying to do your job to the best of your abilities as your main priority. If you know in your heart that you are doing your job well, then all you have to is say so to this guy. Try the rational and professional approach. Its not popular but it does work. Especially against knuckledraggers. Take the high road. Its fun to watch them furrow their brow in attempts to comprehend the situation.

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It's gonna get rough if you take it this far but sometimes you have to be the bigger person and get rid of the dinosaurs, I mean global warming got rid of the dino's, you can too.

I thought it was the "Nuclear Winter" effect, following the meteor strike?

I still humbly suggest trying to do your job to the best of your abilities as your main priority. If you know in your heart that you are doing your job well, then all you have to is say so to this guy.

So true!
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