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The cucumber thing is too funny

you just knew what it was gonna be from that dispatcher. No more words were necessary

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Just a few minutes ago, I heard the following on the sheriff's dept frequency: "Unit 89, Unit 74, respond to Walmart on a report of a 10-10 verbal (argument) between a woman and a seven year old

That must be why the NYPD, FDNY, and FDNY EMS refer to someone as "Being Under", as opposed to "Under Arrest", so we don't get erroneous calls for prisoners whose (alleged) hearts are still beating.

Dispatch notes: "27 year old female, nude in the front yard, playing card stuck in her vagina"

Crew: "Oooook?"

Notification: "County ###-## notification..."

County: "###-##?"

Crew: "Enroute to _________ Hospital with a Class 4, 27 year old female, work up after inappropriate relations with a queen of hearts...2 minutes"

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I hope this doesn't brake any rules, but seriously, we got dispatched as follows:

"Attention EMS, need you to respond to ______, for an elderly male choking on his chicken" When we asked for FD assistance, they dispatched them as "Need you to respond to ____ for EMS assist, reference to an elderly male choking on a piece of chicken"

Ended up being an elderly male (with a G-Tube mind you), who had aspirated on chicken soup!! Aspiration lung sounds are nasty!!

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