Hello all,
I am fairly new to this website and this is my first post. I am wondering if someone has advice for me. I completed an accelerated EMT-Basic training course the spring of 2015. The volunteer department I am affiliated with has done nothing less than support me through my training. There were countless times that other EMT's or Paramedics offered to meet with me on their own time to help me study. Two of the best Paramedics I know met with some of my classmates and I to practice patient care scenarios before the NREMT practical exam. Truly, the world of EMS is proving to be a second family to me and I feel very honored to be a part of it.
However, through all of this I continue to lack confidence in my abilities to make the best decisions when time is critical, such as a call for a patient who is coding. I understand that we who work in Paramedicine are just as human as the patients for whom we care. We can make mistakes. However, part of the great responsibility of being a healthcare provider is that people entrust you with their safety and in that case of EMS, their lives.
This past week my Chief and Assistant Chief presented me with a First Responder bag and radio. They want me to become familiar with the equipment and begin responding to calls on my own. I am excited to do this but honestly it intimidates me. I worry that I might think I know what to do but will mess up when everything hits the fan, so to speak.
I am currently studying to be an RN and have a part-time job at a pediatric hospital's Emergency Department. I am able to work alongside nurses, physicians, and EMS crews. Every day they teach me more about life in the world of emergency medicine. Last weekend there were three vicitims of a very bad car accident brought in. By the time my shift ended we had lost one of the kids and the other two were critically injured. It rattled me. I am confident that emergency medicine is where I am meant to be, and yet it still gets to me sometimes. It is like taking on something that both fascinates and terrifies at the same time. I love it and feel overwhelmed by it all at once.
I may be unusual in feeling this way but I thought I would put these thoughts out there in case anyone is willing to share some advice. Does this fade with time? How long did it take you to feel comfortable in EMS?
Thank you,
Chris