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riverbender

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    Career Student, NSCA-Certified Personal Trainer

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  1. Hi everyone, I'm sorry to clog up your forum with my stuff. This may be little more than a bit of PTSD. I haven't been sleeping right for the past few days. I spent last night reading here for about 4 hours. I laughed and I cried. Here's the deal, I am CPR certified as a requirement for my personal trainer certification. I've been to that class 3x so far. While at the gym a few days ago, a seemingly healthy 27 year old had what looked to my HouseMD medical training, a seizure, on the floor in front of me. I pretty much froze. The only thing I could think was think, "&*!@ in 3 minutes he'll be dead. MOVE MOVE MOVE! You are supposed to help him you idiot. MOVE!!!!" I was able to gather myself enough to do the head tilt - though I failed to actually look past his tongue. I felt for breathing. With my hand? ugh. I thought I felt warm air coming out of his mouth. Cool he's not gonna die!! His girlfriend was screaming his name. I watched her slap his face a couple of times (while his eyes are rolled back in his head ugh), brush his wrist to check for pulse (ugh again) and then she sorta kinda started doing compressions. Like maybe infant CPR compressions?? Two of them. Then she stopped. My brain knew that was not what they taught me in CPR class (maybe just a month ago!). My mouth said, "Do you know CPR?" She said, "Yes". So, I was relieved that I was not going to have to kill him. I let her do it instead. I yelled at the gym manager to get the AED. Then I got up. Hey, he was breathing. Let her kill him. I don't wanna do it damnit!!! Helpful aren't I? Really though, there are 3 hospitals within a 3 mile radius of the gym. This area seems to be over saturated with healthcare. Every time a new building goes up it's medical related. I've seen med & nursing students in the gym reading on the treadmill and even reading on weight benches when I need to use one!!! (I'm not exaggerating. I have pictures LOL). I know that the manager is CPR certified and was doing even less than I was at the moment. LOL I was kinda pissed. Now I get it. The whole time, my overwhelming feeling was, this guy is gonna die soon but there's gotta be someone in here better qualified to help him than idiot me!!! I couldn't think past "is he breathing?" And then I felt air. AND he was definitely seizing - or doing something that looked like a seizure anyway. So honestly I was relieved to just let him seize. What else could I do? I dunno? They don't even mention the seizure thing in CPR class I expected to see a lifeless body. NOT! However, not more than a minute after I felt the warm air, he started to turn blue and that's when I had a choice - either go into bitch mode (I do it very well), start screaming at people (including poor girlfriend) to STFU and stop hovering (there hadda be 10 people standing over him at that point) and take control with my non-existent skills and kill the guy myself. Thankfully at that moment I heard a man yell, "is he breathing?" He jumped on the guy and told the girlfriend to do two breaths. I had to walk away after that. I was about ready to go down myself. Here's my issue.... That guy is still on a ventilator. I've heard through the grapevine the words arrhythmia & heart attack. I am two weeks from opening a personal training studio where I will be alone with my clients. I've already signed the lease. I have clients who are morbidly obese with high BP. I do not have, nor can I afford an AED. (!!!)) I have a client with mild asthma. I can NOT be in this situation again. I can not have someone almost die right in front of me and freeze up like that. I won't survive it LOL. Not funny really. I'm serious. I think I could have helped that guy had I had some confidence or experience. So, I was thinking that the only way to get that experience in these situations which that stupid CPR class does not prepare you for (!!!), is to actually have to DO it. Which sucks if you think about it So, I google EMT training. I'd really like to know if I am just over reacting? Or would doing volunteer work help me learn how to deal with the stress of the situation. 8 million things were going through my head. Probably 99.99% wrong or irrelevant. I still can't help but wonder if things might have turned out differently had I been able to act. I don't want to feel like this again. Are my reasons/motivations for wanting to do this selfish??? I feel like they might be. That can't be a good thing. Then again, it would be a good thing if someone doesn't have to die at 27 because I froze. Or maybe do you folks have a better idea as to how I can prepare myself for that emotional stress? I dunno. I felt like I just was not any way shape or form prepared for what happened!!!
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