Chief1C

Call air support to execute a plucking, **** that ****

Could it be? Eighty? %#@% Yeah!

When I took the course, some fifteen years prior to this date, the text books were printed in 1992. It took a good while to learn how to be a proper provider, and not just a schooled ambulance attendant.

I'm partial to Weekend at Bernie's II

I'd be clawing to prevent falling off the edge of the earth, if I had that stuff. In fact, I need an IV just thinking about the last time I had it. Holy shit.... I was calling dinosaurs for hours! I puked till it was air, then blood and back to air..then it came from the other direction. Granted it was the whole bottle, not to mention A LOT of something else. Maybe a bottle of Jager. Something licorice flavored, when coming back up.

Ugh! If I wanted a raw hamburger, I'd have tried to cook it myself.

I have worked someone that had been down for a while. A long while, it took one hand to roll them to a board. The whole body moved with one tug. I'd say at least 8-10 hours. Cold, blue, blood pooled. Why? The patients son. Probably in his 40's, but mentally, like 5; and holding a rifle. He wasn't pointing it at us. He put it down, got in the ambo, and we transported to the funeral home where PD and a caregiver met us. We did do some CPR on scene, so he'd put it down..and it turned out to be an air rifle. But I wasn't looking to close. He had to get to the funeral home anyway, so we saved them whatever they would have charged to come get the body.

They do not go in the ambo. Ones right to bear arms ends where my safety becomes a top priority. Cops can take it, or leave it with their vehicle, home, etc. Put it in the custody of another responder, FD, etc., until an LEO arrives, as to not delay transport. We have this all the time. Won't take a gun. We'll drop your dog off somewhere, but not your gun.

Blame the weather and turf her off to the nearest sprinkler.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh 79. #$@!ing finally, batman.

I can't sleep. Speaking of TIC's. Great way to catch a drunk driver at an accident... "I was the passenger, the driver ran off...." Look at the engine, look at the seats. Soon enough prior that the engine is warm, the driver seat is warm...and the passenger seat is cold. Huh. What a co-inky-dink.

It was fun. Got totally wasted. Burned my hand and arm...lighting fireworks I didn't have a permit for...with a road flare...while...drunk. Fortunately I know first aid.

In this, the land of "only open from Memorial Day to Labor Day", you can get damn near anything, 24/7. Do you know what you cannot purchase, at 0430, on Independence Day? Blue Star Ointment. It's bad. REALLY BAD. I may cry. I thought it was from the heat. I was WRONG. VERY F**KING WRONG. HOLY M************ **** ****BALLS BATMAN...was I wrong.

I make it a point not to wire anything in to anywhere. Everything on my vehicle can be quickly removed, including its wiring. The radio is on a power port, the siren is on a power port and the light bar is too; and it was meant to be hardwired. If I'm traveling, I don't want to be identified as an EMS provider; so I strip it all off. Not saying that I wouldn't stop if nobody else was at a crash. Besides, here, and in the whole state, what you're setting up would be 100% w/o a doubt illegal. Dash lights, alone are illegal; must be visible 360*; and not include headlight or grill flashers. So, the only reasonable alternative would be to get a dash light with a magnet, and remember to pull it off the roof before you open your door. Happens. The key is, intersection and turn visibility, not just in front of and behind of. You need to be seen, if you're stopped along the road; and that also includes wearing an ANSI Compliant vest, in addition to a "hey, don't ram me" light. I wouldn't recommend decking your vehicle out w/ tons of lights. If you were my responder, and I do manage volunteers from a supervisory point of view, I wouldn't let you use grill or dash lights, no matter how much it cost. They're for safety, not speed or looking cool.

Your friend should enlist in the armed forces before he she or it gets to a hearing. I know of a medic, now, who got two DUI's in one night. Nailed, someone picked him up and dropped him off to get his car. Nailed again. Became a Marine. Served. No repercussions, fines, loss of license, et al. But he became a paramedic afterward... Maybe they figured it was punishment enough?

Is there paper versions, or just electronic?

Depends. Sometimes you don't get what you pay for.. Maybe it's just a regional thing, I get paid for my position. But I've met some sincerely stupid medics and EMT's lately. Just dumbfounded me by their ignorance. So much so, that I nearly quit b/c there was nothing to do but fire them. All of them. I don't pay people to sit and watch, I pay people to treat patients.

Mentally and Physically exhausted. I need to be put down.

Drugs?

Why are smurfs blue?

Nope.. I'm broke and I literally have no sexual determination. I find it boring, in fact; I'm not impotent by any means, but I find no interest in it or desire for it. Dunno why. Maybe I'm just uber depressed? Hard to say.

It's our 65th year. I'll prolly do a snippet on facebook, but I won't go out of my way b/c I honestly don't think anyone cares anymore. But I'm still on my soap box about the "Ambulance Whistle". Yanno, to get more help. What did fire departments do for decades, some still do mind you, they blew massive whistles, horns or sirens. Yanno, like an air raid siren. Well, I suggest we get one - b/c even the fire dept. doesn't have one, and use it just for ambulance calls. Even if we have a crew, which we do 99.99999999999% of the time. Just set it off to piss people off, one blast in day light and at least ten good drawn out blasts between 1900 and 0659. Then, when there is enough new people to satisfy, we can burn the pole down and kill the siren. Whoop. I have spell check, but I still screw it up. I've had a migraine for like six days...and I don't get them. I keep losing shit, forgetting shit and randomly loosing track while driving. Like I'll be one place, and know it, then ten miles later, I'll wonder how I got there without realizing I was driving. Freaky. I like the decal doohickey on the sides.

Don't drink the water Boo-frickey-ya b%#@h! I got 73 I waited 73 pages to get a new one...

oh my gawd. I need drugs, stat! I like saying STAT! It makes me feel official. Anyhoo.. Almost 70% of my body is slathered in solarpropane. That's Solarcaine. But it has propane in it, so I call it SolarPropane. ETOH. Sun. ETOH. ETOH. Inability to maintain consciousness...but at least I flopped around, and it's even on both sides. There is a gap, prolly six inches, right in the center...over the boys.. and my ass.. that isn't as red as a ripe tomato. I appear to be leaking, too. I think I may have overdone it this time. I had a WaterJel blanket in the tub earlier trying to stop the fricken burning sensation. I'll prolly have to sleep wrapped in burn sheets so I won't stick to my sheets. I want page 75.

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