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ems*girl

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  1. I had this partner that she was gay. Our area is made up of alot of mountains and hillbillies. We were told to turn up this (log road) then turn left go two miles and their house is on right hand side of the road and it is a white shed with a green roof they had turned into a home. Found out everyone one on that road lived in a white shedwith a green roof. So about almost two miles we started stopping at anything that looked like a shed /house white with a green roof. There was surprisingly a lot of them lol. Dispatch asked if we are getting closer ( 30 min into our response time frantically looking for this house on the corner of BFE and boy you sure do got a prutty mouth) (my partner looked like a 15 year old boy so I wasn't too worried)Dispatch said pt was having increasly bad pain and said their kid will meet you at the road holding a red umbrella. We told dispatch OK and sped up hoping we didn't pass the house already. Then around 6 miles up on this log trail. We spot this little fat kid on the hill in front of us, approx.age 10, whoopin the shit out of an umbrella. He was sweating and his belly hanging out under his shirt. His little chubby face was red and mad. (My partner was driving) I looked over at her and said " ummm I wonder if that is a RED umbrella? (this boy was whippin'it back and forth) My partner: long pause and with a very calm voice and the shrug of her shoulder said "I am going to run him over. " (I was dying laughing)I said "Noo.... don't do that":) I looked in the rear veiw mirror this little chubby kid was running behind the ambulance down the drive way, with the umbrella turned inside out behind him. This was my partners turn to take the back. so we were headed back out to the main road. She popped through the middle door(that devides the front and back of the ambulance) and said do you think you can drive alittle faster than 15 miles an hour. (it smelled bad I guess not sure why) I said "why? she is hollerin' in pain at every bump" My partner said "do know why? Her vagina has been hurting for the last week." I asked "why? " My partner said "the shit if I know" I said "didn't you look?" She said "your sick! D.R.I.V.E FASTER!!!" Me: I almost peed on my self from laughing so hard best call EVER! I miss her
  2. I was fairly new. We were sitting around the station and i got up and went into the bathroom to do my business. I hear sirens out side the station my partner yells out "hey Garcia!!! We have an mvc right out side the station!!! Let's Go!!!" I bust out of that like Superman coming out of his phone booth. Everyone was standing there waiting and dying laughing. I said" really y'all are as*h\+es I was pooping!! now I have to finish whipping." Lol
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